Double Edged Sword

William and I happened to have the most annoying seats in the entire world at mass yesterday. There was a little kid behind us that kept pulling my hair and saying, "Stop, stop" over and over again as if someone was tickling him. Beside me was a dad, who I'm pretty sure slept in his church clothes and was wearing flip flops even though he seriously needed to cut his toe nails. He kept cuddling his 9 or 10 year old daughter. Horribly distracting.  William laughed as we walk out and said, "We always get the worst seats when it's the "love one another as I have loved you" reading. Touchee, Lord.

The readings at Mass yesterday could not have been more perfectly fit to our life situation right now. Its true that the Word of God is alive and still sharper than any two edged sword. 

Acts 14:21-27

Now it may seem like the first reading is just an account of what Paul and Barnabas were doing. However there is a line in their that went straight into my heart, 

“It is necessary for us to undergo many hardships to enter the kingdom of God.” 

I think sometimes people forget the purpose of the marriage and get caught up in the wedding, let me tell you, I understand. The wedding seems like an all consuming vortex. However, the purpose of my marriage to William, is that I believe in my heart of hearts that he is the person most capable of helping me get to Heaven. I believe that he will make me laugh when I want to cry, and be an incredible father to our children.  The devil has been prowling like a lion, trying to find opportunities to ruin what I know to be our vocation. He comes veiled with the best of intentions, but with a horrible bite none the less. But Luke gives us these words of encouragement, "It is NECESSARY for us to undergo many hardships to enter the kingdom of God." He doesn't say just that it is going to happen, he says it is NECESSARY. I could not agree with him more. Coming out on the other side of a hardship strengthens our faith and resolve. These necessary hardships only make us stronger and more assured of our love for one another and confidence in the support that we will offer one another during the difficult times that are assuredly ahead. 

Behold, I make all things new.

I think the book of Revelations is weird. It has never been my favorite, since 5th grade when someone tried to tell me that Catholics were going to Hell while waving a Book of Revelation at me separated from the rest of the Bible. Still, I cannot get over how many times John makes reference to preparing ourselves for salvation being like the preparation of a Bride for her Bridegroom. In fact, throughout the Bible, there are tons of mentions of the Bride preparing herself for her Bridegroom. 

 For the wedding day of the Lamb has come,his bride has made herself ready. She was allowed to wear a bright, clean linen garment.” (The linen represents the righteous deeds of the holy ones.) Revelation 19:7-8

I also saw the holy city, a new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. Revelation 21:2

My dreaded final Confession before the wedding is quickly approaching. While I don't want to because I view the confessional much like the doctor's office and I have a serious case of White Coat syndrome, I know how important it is that this bride's soul be prepared for her Bridegroom. In the times that the Bible was written, preparing for marriage was a lengthy process (somehow still not as long as our engagement). The betrothal is first, when the Bride is then considered married, and then she is given a year to prepare herself for being a wife before she is taken into her husbands home. Interestingly enough, the Bride would not know the time when the groom would be coming to get her to take her into his home. Thank God, that's over. I can only imagine the anticipation. The Hebrews put immense value on this year of preparation for the Bride. At the end of the passage from Revelation from mass yesterday, I am filled with comfort because "The One who sat on the throne then said, "Behold, I make all things new." Rev 21:5a  I will be prepared for my Bridegroom because through confession I will be made new and more worthy to be given as the best wedding gift to my groom. 

I could write a whole separate blog post about how "love one another as I have loved you" applies to our preparation for marriage. Perhaps for another day. 

We are so excited. I feel like saying that has become very tired and trite. I am too ready. We are so prepared, I feel like I do about Christmas around December 6th, when I am just like, okay get here already. I know getting to NC will renew all of our excitement and fill us with the necessary patience until we arrive safely on the other side of our honeymoon and can begin our married love story together. Keep praying. Keep encouraging. You have no idea how your kind words sustain us. 

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